FileTitle: List1250.html
Category: Humor
Type: List
Description: Words of Wisdom (Quips list)
- All generalisations are false.

- Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

- I love cats.  They taste just like chicken.

- The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.

- Conserve toilet paper.  Use both sides.

- I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.

- Save a tree.  Eat a Beaver.

- Work is for people who don't know how to fish.

- Sex is a misdemeanour.  The more I miss it, the meaner I get.

- I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

- Nobody's ugly after 2am.

- Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.

- Real women don't have hot flushes.  They have *power surges*.

- Where there's a will, I want to be in it!

- If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

- I don't suffer from insanity.  I enjoy every minute of it!

- Learn from your parents' mistakes.  Use birth control!

- It's lonely at the top.  But at least you eat better.

- A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

- Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

- We are born naked, wet and hungry.  Then things get worse.

- He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

- Always remember you're unique.  Just like everyone else!

- Lead me not into temptation.  I can find it myself.