Letters Of Recommendations For Employees

 If you have to write a letter of recommendation for a fired employee, here
are a few suggested phrases:

 -For the chronically absent:
 "A man like him is hard to find."
 "It seemed her career was just taking off."

 -For the office drunk:
 "I feel his real talent is wasted here."
 "We generally found him loaded with work to do."
 "Every hour with him was a happy hour."

 -For an employee with no ambition:
 "He could not care less about the number of hours he had to put
 in."
 "You would indeed be fortunate to get this person to work for
 you."

 -For an employee who is so unproductive that the job is better
 left unfilled:
 "I can assure you that no person would be better for the job."

 -For an employee who is not worth further consideration as a job
 candidate:
 "I would urge you to waste no time in making this candidate an
 offer of employment."
 "All in all, I cannot say enough good things about this
 candidate or recommend him too highly."

 -For a stupid employee:
 "There is nothing you can teach a man like him."
 "I most enthusiastically recommend this candidate with no
 qualifications whatsoever."

 -For a dishonest employee:
 "Her true ability was deceiving."
 "He's an unbelievable worker."