FileTitle: Prose1754.html
Category: Humor
Type: Prose
Description: Darwin Award Type (Folklore?)
     There are many transmission lines that crisscross Connecticut. These
are held up by Transmission Towers of various constructions. Those most
commonly installed near urban areas are called "metal Ornamental Towers"
(supposedly prettier than wood towers).  Sometimes adventurous folks climb
the towers in order to enjoy the view and the night air.  Most stay away
from the wires, and when they get bored, come back down.
     Apparently, a man who was forlorn after a recent spat with his
girlfriend needed some fresh air to clear his head and decided to climb a
tower. He stopped for a 6 pack to help clear his thoughts, went to a tower
south of Hartford, next to I-91, and climbed  it.
     Public Service employees later pieced the story together. The man sat
there 60 feet above the highway, drank his beer and consoled his bruised
ego. After 5 beers, he needed to do what people often need to do after 5
beers. It being such a long hike down, he unzipped and did his business
right there off the tower.
     Electricity is a funny thing. One doesn't need to touch a wire in order
to get shocked. Depending on conditions, 115,000 volt lines, like those
supported by the tower, could shock a person as far away as 6 feet.
     When the man "whizzed" near the conductor (wire), the power arced up
his "stream" (urine is an excellent conductor of electricity), traveled up
to his private parts, and blew him off the tower.
     The guys at the power company noted a momentary outage on this line and
sent repairmen to see if there was any damage. When they got to the scene of
the accident, they found a very dead person, his fly down, what was left of
his private parts smoking, and a single beer left on top.