FileTitle: Prose347.html
Category: Humor
Type: Prose
Description: Sex Legalese of the Highest Order
Subject: The Law as it should be

One evening after attending yhr theater,two gentlemen were walking
down the avenue when they observed a rather well dressed and attractive
young lady walking just ahead of them. One turned to the other and
remarked, "I'd give $50.00 to spend the night with her. To their
surprise the young lady overheard the remark, and turning around,
She said, "I'll take you up on that." She had a neat appearance
and a pleasant voice, so after bidding his friend good-night,
the man accompanied the young lady to her apartment, where they
immediately went to bed.
The following morning, the man presented her with $25.00 as he
prepared  to leave.She demanded the full amount that had been stated
and threatened to sue unless she did get it. He laughed, saying,
"I'd like to see you get it on these grounds"
The nexr day he was surprised when he received a summons ordering
his presence in court as defendant in a law suit. He hurried to his
lawyer and explained the details of the case. His lawyer didn't
think she could get a judgement with such grounds, but thought it
would be interesting to see how her case would be presented.
The next day, in court, after the usual preliminaries, the lady's
lawyer addressed the court as follows: Your Honor, my client is the
owner of a piece of shrubbery, which properth she agreed to rent
to the defendant for a specified length of time for the sum of
$50.00. The defendant took possession of the property, used it
extensively for the purpose for which it was rented, but upon
evacuating the premises, he paid only $25.00, half the amount
agreed upon.The rent was not excwssive since it is restricted
property and we ask judgement to be granted against the defendant
to assure payment of the balance.
The defendants lawyer was impressed and amused at the way his
opponent had presented the case. his sefense, therefore, was
somewhat altered from the way he had orginally planned to present it.
"Your Honor," he said, My client afrees that the young lady has
a fine piece of property, and that he did rent such property for
a time, and that a degree of pleasure was derived from the
transaction. However, my client found a well on the property
around which he placed his own stones, sunk a shaft and erected
a pump,all labor being preformed personally by him. We claim that
these improvedmrnts to the property were sufficient to offset the
amount and the plaintiff was adequately comppensated for the rental of
the property. We ask that judgement be not granted.
The younng ladys lawyer's comeback was this, "your honor", my client
"agrees that the defendant did find a well on her property and that
he did make improvements such as my opponnent has described, however,
had the defendant not known that the well existed, he would have never
rented the property in the first place. Also , upon evacuation of
the property, the defendant removed the stones, pulled out the shaft,
and took the punp with him. In doing so he not only dragged his
equipment through the shrubbery, but left the hole much larger than
it was prior to his occupancy, making it easily accessible to
little children, we therefore ask judgement to be granted."
...................It was................