FileTitle: Prose399.html
Category: Humor
Type: Prose
Description: Marraige Wisdom - (Seriously)
Subject: Ann Landers "How to Preserve a Husband."

Dear Ann Landers:
 A long time ago, you printed a recipe called "How to Preserve a Husband." It
was just wonderful, and I thought it might be a good idea to print it again.
How about it, Ann?
 New Orleans Reader

 Dear New Orleans Reader:
 I agree. Here it is: HOW TO PRESERVE A HUSBAND First, use care in selection.
Get one that is not too young, but tender and healthy. If you choose one
recklessly, it may not keep.
 Don't put in hot water. This makes them turn sour. Sweeten with smiles, and
spice with patience. All varieties will respond. To ensure a wonderful
consistency, stir gently over a low flame and don't leave unattended for long
periods of time. To add a delicious flavor, sprinkle generously with praise
and appreciation.
 The poorest specimen may be improved if you follow these instructions and
will keep for an unlimited number of years in any climate.
 Tested by Yours Truly.

 Dear Truly:
 I'd like to add one small suggestion: Frequent exposure to cold temperatures
has been known to damage this dish permanently. Keep a small and steady flame
going at all times.
 --Ann Landers' column is distributed by the Creators Syndicate--