I'm just thankful that I married a man who didn't need Louis
Farrakhan or Bill McCartney to tell him that he needed to keep his
promises.

Isn't it funny how those so called "concerned citizens" who picket
porn shops, leave gun shops in the same neighborhood alone.

If they cut off your electricity, gas or water do they use a "utility
knife?"

I have a friend who's so obnxious that a telemarketer hung up on him.

One Halloween trick or treater showed up at my door dressed as an IRS
agent. It was very authentic; he took 40 percent of our candy.

Sometimes I think I'm undecided, and then sometimes I'm not so sure.

A sure way to test your kids' mathematical skills is to shortchange
them on their allowances.